It’s been nearly fifty years since Neal Armstrong first set foot on that globe of white rock we know as the moon. Fifty years. And in that half a century, there hasn’t been a stellar movie about this incredible work of science and exploration that once awed the world.
Let me tell you now, that wait is over. Continue reading →
Drew Goddard, did you… did you make this movie just for me??
Bad Times at the El Royale (2018); Written and directed by Drew Goddard
Bad Times at the El Royal isn’t based off a comic, book, existing movie; it’s not a reboot, remake or retread. It’s a completely original piece, harder and harder to find these days. And… for all that…it’s… Continue reading →
In the two thousand and eighteenth year of our Lord, Sony Pictures, yet again, begins their attempt to craft a universe, a cinematic universe, to rival that of Marvel. This idea’s been floating around since the ill-fated years of the Amazing Spider-Maniverse, with rumors swirling of Venom movies, Sinister Six movies, and (god forbid) a young Aunt May prequel. And it finally happened. Here it is, here we stand, amidst the pinnacle of their achievement and…Sony…what did it cost…? Continue reading →
This review starts with a story, a tale of woe, a yarn of infinite sadness if you will. My local theatre had a handful of showings of the original Jurassic Park in honor of its twenty-fifth anniversary. There was simply no way, come heaven or hell, I would miss the opportunity to see Jurassic goddamn Park. So, my sister and I made plans to go see it. Smash cut to an hour before the showing: turns out the last showing was the previous night. Tears were shed. Shadows became darker, and all hope seemed lost. With no happiness or purpose left in my withered body, I told my sister to just pick a movie, any movie and we’ll go see that. She picked A Simple Favor. Continue reading →
The Predator franchise is a classic, a staple of the action/sci-fi genre. Arnold, our sweet boy Arnold, altered the course of the world on June the 12th, 1987 when the first film was released. Audiences have screamed and frothed for more, with two sequels (we don’t talk about AvP) spanning the course of the next thirty years. And the best part…I’ve seen none of them. Not one. SO LET’S REVIEW A PREDATOR MOVIE.
The Predator (2018); Directed by Shane Black
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Dear readers, gosh, hello, it’s been some time, hasn’t it? Looking at my last post, it’s crazy to think that Jurassic World 2; The Second One; The Worst One was the last movie I reviewed. I’m sorry to leave that horrible, horrible movie as the last thing I’ve left you with. Well, I’m here to correct that. Let’s do a BLOODY CATCH-UP.
This will be split into two portions; the first half is all the new movies I saw this summer I didn’t write about and the second half is all the movies I revisited this summer that I haven’t discussed in a post previously but are still worth discussing. And awaaaaaay we GO!
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Jurassic World 2/Jurassic Park 6 is weird and bad and it should feel bad. This has been a review by Dylan, thank you all for coming today.
Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom (2018); Directed by
You remember how Jurassic World was just kind of a softcore remake of the first Jurassic Park? Do you remember The Lost World? Well, Jurassic World is just Continue reading →